Discouraged

Tonight I am completely, absolutely, utterly discouraged and exhausted.  You've been warned. 
 I think it all started yesterday when I took Ellie to the doctor.  She has frequent stomach aches, so the doc asked me how her eating is.  Honestly, she is my best eater.  He asked me how often she eats vegetables.  Ughh.  Well, how often does she eat her veggies? This opened a whole world for my brain to wonder and start feeling bad about. How often does she eat her veggies????  How much sugar does she eat? How much white flour does she eat? How much processed foods does she eat?  How much meat does she eat that is full of hormones and steroids? How often does she excersize? Do I put sunscreen on her enough- but not to much so she can get enough vitamin D?  Is she taking a multivitamin? Is she spending to much time in front of the TV or computer? Can she be successful without taking music or dance lessons?  Do we read scriptures enough?  Do we say prayers enough? brush their teeth, do homework enough, blah blah blah enough??? And I have 3 other kids to worry about!  AHHHHHHH!!!  
 How often does she eat her veggies??? How often do we even sit down for dinner?  Sunday we are usually being lazy, Monday we are pretty good about dinner, Tuesday is a scramble before scouts, Wed. is Activity Days, Thursday used to be Odyssey of the Mind, Friday is pizza night, and Saturday's usually Darren and I go out.  So 1 or two days a week we sit down and eat dinner and my kids get their veggies. Yea.  I even try make a serious effort to keep our lives simple!  How is it that I find myself scrambling every day.  I have tried different things to get the kids to eat more veggies.  I started making a green smoothy almost every day, but I am the only one who will drink it.  And when my husband always comments on how disgusting the smoothy looks it doesn't' help.  I feel like it is a loosing battle.  Mom vs. family.  Then there is the whole sugar issue.  I have almost completely cut sugar out of my diet.  So, how is it that my kids live almost entirely off of it?  It seems if I don't buy treats, they always get it from somewhere.  The bank, church, Scouts, Activity Days, someone has a birthday at school, holidays, weekends, birthday parties, etc.  It seems as if there is always a special occasion or holiday.  My kids get sugar stuffed down their throats just by living in our society.  I remember talking to a woman I was friends with who had adopted older kids from different countries, I think Africa and India.  I offered one of them a Snickers bar and she said, "Oh no, he can't eat that!" She told me that her kids couldn't eat hardly any sugar, or it would make them sick because they didn't grow up eating it.  That has made me think a lot about how much sugar our kids eat. Which makes me feel bad and discouraged because my kids eat tons of sugar! (and white flour, and processed foods, and genetically engineered corn, wheat and hormone fed beef)  It's not like we are perfect by any stretch of the imagination.   I feel like pulling my hair out and sitting in front of the TV and watching a movie!
 Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Darren has been gone 3 weeks and my kids didn't have school this week. Or maybe that I hurt my arm and it is killing, or that Gabe threw a can of peaches on my flip-flop wearing foot at the grocery store.  Or maybe it's that my house is a WRECK, I need to plan the scouts Blue & Gold banquet, I haven't done laundry for 5 days, I spent way to much money at Costco, and I didn't get Gabe in bed till 9:30, Paul and Kyle didn't go to bed till 10:30, and Ellie is still awake!  And it's St. Patricks Day tomorrow, so the Leprechauns still have to come!  And I need to plan my lesson for church tomorrow.  And I am exhausted cause I took my kids to the parade this morning and then the beach today, and didn't put sunscreen on  my kids so they are all sunburned and sure to get skin cancer because of my bad parenting.  And to top it all off I have been eating tons of sugar so I have no energy.
  Maybe I will just go to bed.  That's what my mom would say, "Honey, go to bed and it will all seem better in the morning." and "Honey, your kids are going to turn out just fine".  Thanks mom, I don't even have to talk to you in real life.  I just imagine a conversation with you and I already feel better.  Yes, mom, I think I will go to bed:)