Emergency C-Section- Luke Part 4

Well, here we go.  It was time for the c-section.  I sat on the table and the CRNA gave me a spinal.  Which by the way was much easier than an epidural. I was so sad as I looked around the OR.  The CRNA wasn't Darren.  The doctor wasn't Dr. Laury.  The hospital wasn't Good Shepherd. I didn't know any of the nurses.  I didn't know anyone.  They were all talking and visiting with each other and I felt so completely alone. I imagined how it could have been.  That made me too sad so I tried to just put it out of my mind.  Then my sweet mom came in.  They got Darren on the doctors phone via Skype.  Right before they started I felt like I was  going to have a panic attack.  I wanted to tell the doctor I had changed my mind.  I wanted to rip down the curtain, jump off the table, run away and hide.  I decided against it.  Besides, I couldn't move my legs so that wouldn't have worked anyways.

Then they got started.  The surgery itself wasn't that bad.  No pain.  I didn't even feel a lot of pulling or tugging.  I asked to watch so they put up a mirror for me so I could see over the curtain.  I watched them pull the baby out.  Then I saw a huge pool of blood and decided I had seen enough.  I didn't want to see my uterus on my stomach.  Darren kept trying to talk to me to distract me.  He even talked about decorating our house.  Unfortunately I wasn't in the mood.  It took a while to stitch me up and at that point all I wanted was to see my baby.  This NICU nurses had been there and took him immediately.  His oxygen stats were low- about 85 and they kept working on him trying to get his oxygen up.  For about 10 minutes I waited and finally said, "so, can I see my baby?   They must not have heard me.  After about half hour the doctor finally said, "Hey, is she going to be able to hold her baby?"   So they brought him to me.  I got to hold him about thirty seconds. Then they took him to the NICU.  It really made me uncomfortable to  have him leave. I have this fear of my baby getting mixed up with another baby.  What mom doesn't?  My mom went with him and I felt better about that.  By that time they were all done and I felt exhausted.  I think I literally passed out.  They wheeled me back to my room and Christina, Malinda, and Laura were all there.  They could have all had a party all night long and I wouldn't have remembered.  I was out of it the rest of the night.  It was so sweet of all them to stay at the hospital till 1 in the morning.  Christina didn't even get there till after midnight. I love my sweet sisters and sisters in law so much.  They were all so kind and supportive.  Although I did feel bad for them.  It wasn't the funnest situation.  Everyone felt so bad for me.  I think poor Laura was traumatized!
 I love this picture of my sweet mom ready to come be with me!

Let's get this party started!

There was Darren trying to talk to me.  It was really hard to not have him really be there.  I was so distracted I wasn't really even paying attention to him.

I love this picture of my insides.  I wish there was a close up!  No wonder it hurt so much for the next... oh, wait, it still hurts.

YEA!!! He's here!!

Here he is!  Born at 11:20 pm on august 19th.  He was 6 lbs. 2 oz. 

My beautiful mom holding the phone so I could talk to Darren.

My amazing CRNA. Not as awesome as Darren, but then, who is?

This picture makes me laugh.  This is NOT how I was feeling inside.

Finally I got to hold my baby!! For 30 seconds.